I’ll Have What He/She’s Having!

I’ll Have What She’s Having!! Photo: sheknows.com

Why are we so easily dissatisfied with our own lot- i.e.withour own self, with what we have, who are we and what we do?

For instance, while it doesn’t help that your best friend/relative’s partner looks drop dead gorgeous; morality (or what’s left of it) says we shouldn’t drool over and dream of being with the aforementioned Beau or Belle All. The. Time!

Why would we rather break a loving or potentially-loving relationship and forge-yes forge-it into our lives?

Why do some of us get such a pleasure and thrill from breaking someone’s home up and make it their own instead?

Is this what real Success involves alongside those of us who toil hard to get what we want?

Isn’t breaking up a home akin to trampling over a sincere professional at work and getting that promotion which they didn’t deserve to get via such devious schemes?
If we can have the motivation to plot, cheat and deceit, why can’t we muster up a little more motivation to get what we want by working hard via the ethical and decent path?

Is it because we just can be bothered? Or is it because we are chicken?
Or, is it both?

Probing deeper, it could very well be because we we think we can’t find another Guy or Girl like Him or Her and therefore think and feel it’s easier to break what’s already been made.

Yes, that will make life easier, make us more popular with our families and friends, make the kids love the step-parent more than their real parents?

Sarcasm aside, maybe it will, but won’t it take a lot of hard work to achieve this? If so, are we afraid of hard work or do we simply want what they have?

Are we confusing consumerist success with personal success in today’s age of instant gratification?
If so, how healthy is this sort of motivation for us physiologically and psychologically?
Your thoughts please…

The author can be contacted at [email protected] and her blog: Sudakshinakina.Wordpress.Com

  • “Is it because we just can be bothered? Or is it because we are chicken?”

    I think we are both! We can’t stand somebody being tooo happy and in love. If your man is good looking, caring and honest; above all, your best friend knows him from close; then he’s likely a target…You are targeted for being good and you are targeted for being bad…It’s a dangerous world…I trust my man but don’t trust the women he deals with….

    • Thanks for your comment.

      I think you have articulated this challenging situation spot on! We’re living in dangerous social times the world over.

  • This is a good point to be raised. thought provoking..

  • Mia Neil

    Good evening from Bavaria, Germany!!

    I’m a girl of 22 years of age and I just stumbled upon your article. Well, to be honest, I’m in a fix 🙁

    I have been all alone for almost 5 years now and recently dating a man who is 7 years older. I knew he was very close to a girl a couple of years older than me. It’s a long story!
    All I want to say is there are people around calling me ‘a home breaker’ I love him more than I love anything in this world. The girl, who he loved, is in depression and probably cursing me….How can I let a person go if he loves me…No one can define a feeling…I have no idea if he really loved her….God knows. I’m a Catholic girl; I’m conservative and have a different perspective to define relationships.

    Don’t you think the foundation of a relation is ‘trust’ and ‘feeling’. Is is OK to allege me a homebreaker?

    • Dear Mia,
      Thanks for your comment and query.I’m glad to see this article has helped you express the inner turmoil you’re experiencing with your personal life.
      To be honest it seems your man is the one who needs to decide what he should do. He doesn’t have the right to leave his partner or you in the lurch. You and she both ought to toughen up and confront him on this. Tell him that he can’t mess you both around like this and that it has to be either her or you- or none of you! Stand up for yourself and defend the values you’ve been raised up with by taking a firm stance. You’ll then find out soon if he deserves your love!
      Best Wishes,
      Sudakshina 🙂